Is It Worth The Wait?
by Dannah Gresh
It was January 2004 when I found it.
I’d been talking to larger and larger audiences about sex for several years—and I was growing bored. How many times could I say the same things about sex? Good grief! This exciting topic was becoming mundane.
My spirit just felt like there had to be something more.
Maybe you’ve been there, bored as you hear yet another sexual purity message drone on. Perhaps even good messages have left you wondering why. “Doesn’t anyone else wonder why everyone is doing the Silver Ring Thing?” We’ve all heard so many trite clichŽs through the years. “It’s a gift you can only unwrap once” and “You can become a recycled virgin” come to mind. Something in me just doesn’t like the idea of comparing virginity to a milk carton. But all these repeated messages about “protecting God’s gift of sex” still leave many wondering why! Why does God want it protected? Without the answer to that question, the rest of our questions about sex are difficult to address. I got to a place where I knew that answering the why question was critical to convincing my brothers and sisters in Christ to wait.
Here’s what I did when I got to that place: I simply prayed, God, blow me away! If I have to keep talking about this, then blow me away with something new that shows me why sex is amazing to You. He did.
A few weeks later, I was reading through Genesis, when I came to these seemingly innocuous words: “Adam lay with his wife Eve, and she became pregnant” (4:1). I’d read over those words before without giving them a second thought. Not this time. I caught the scent of something being not quite as it seemed. For the first time, it occurred to me: “He was so not just layin’ there!”
Clearly this was not one of Adam’s more passive moments. Sometimes the Bible makes a lot more sense if you look at it from the perspective of the original writers. So I decided to take a look. I grabbed a Hebrew dictionary and dug through it with passion. What was the word the Hebrew writer used in that sentence? I had to know.
You’ll never hear that word the same way again. How amazingly ironic that this Hebrew word for sex—a word that sends nearly everyone into laughter at some point in their lives—is most often used today to communicate a sense of boredom. Merriam-Webster.com defines it as a noun that means “boring or empty talk.” “Yada yada yada” could just as well mean “blah blah blah” in our society.
Turns out it’s not so boring after all. And in Hebrew it’s a verb—an action word and then some!
So what does it really mean?
The definition of the Hebrew word yada is “to know, to be known, to be deeply respected.” What an amazing thing God thought about sex. That it was to be something that causes us to deeply know another. Without alluding directly to the physical act of sexuality, this word points to the deep emotional quenching I yearn for in the act of sex.
I’m not alone.
Almost every female I’ve spoken to about this admits she isn’t really yearning for a physical touch in her sexual encounters but is seeking a deep emotional caressing. We want to find our guy looking at and studying us. We want to hear our name whispered. We need him to listen to our words with all his heart. We want to “be known.”
Dannah Gresh is the bestselling author of books like And The Bride Wore White and Lies Young Women Believe (with Nancy Leigh DeMoss). Her newest release What Are You Waiting For? The One Thing No One Ever Tells You About Sex traces God’s language of sexuality from Genesis to Revelation, and unlocks the truth found in the chemicals of sex. You can find Dannah online at www.purefreedom.org
Excerpted from What Are You Waiting For? by Dannah Gresh Copyright © 2011 by Dannah Gresh. Excerpted by permission of WaterBrook Press, a division of Random House, Inc. All rights reserved. No part of this excerpt may be reproduced or reprinted without permission in writing from the publisher.