Living the Life You’re Longing For
by Beth Moore
Our perception of Jesus is sketched on the canvas in pencil swayed strongly by this point of view: do we see Him as a giver or a taker? Naturally, the only healthy inclination is to flee from a taker and run to a giver. It’s not that Jesus has never taken anything from me because He has. He’s taken shame from me, frequent defeat, paralyzing fear, debilitating guilt, and chronic regret. Well, and jealousy. There was that. And a ton of insecurity. That’s not to say we don’t lay some things down and make some sacrifices on the path of following Jesus. We do, but as they say, therein lies the paradox. Self-importance turns out to be self-sabotage and getting over ourselves turns into finding ourselves. Our true selves. The lives we were born to live. We’ll never catch a glimpse of vision with our eyes rolled back in our heads. We’ll slit the throat of our own satisfaction with the silky smooth feather of self-focus. Jesus worded it this way in Matthew 10:39:
“Anyone finding his life will lose it, and anyone losing his life because of Me will find it.”
Those willing to give up their insatiable self-preoccupation to identify with Jesus and follow Him furiously will find an ever-unfolding life and love that they couldn’t have scripted if they’d tried. We all, with unveiled faces, 2 Corinthians 3:18 says, are looking as in a mirror at the glory of the Lord and are being transformed into the same image from glory to glory. Another translation says it this way: from one degree of glory to another. God knew better than to lay it all out there at once. With brilliant mastery, He insisted on mystery. We don’t get an advance bio of the precise life we’re trading our self-absorption for. Even that is a gift from the giver. God authored a masterpiece of a story by setting into motion a process that would require a journey of faith. It was meant to be a nail-biter. It was intended all along to be a process that would require the naked exposure of our most sacred, carefully-guarded human possession: our trust.
For some of you, that’s the deal breaker. That’s the one thing you’re not willing to fully expose and invest. The relational last frontier. I understand that in every way. In my most fundamental childhood years, the person I needed to trust the most was the person I could trust the least. When protectors turn into perpetrators, nothing comes harder for us. But I believe that inherent in the human journey is the lifelong search for someone worthy of our trust.
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