I Prayed for This Child
In 1979 I relinquished my first-born child to adoption. Not married at the time, it was best for my baby who I named Sarah. A wonderful Christian couple became Sarah’s parents in a closed adoption. My little girl’s adoptive mom had been like the biblical Hannah and prayed for a child. And God heard her prayer.
The years passed, and like Hannah in the Bible I, too, began to pray for a child to comfort me in the loss of my baby. Though Sarah lived, my womb and arms felt as empty as if she had died. My child was gone from my life. I would never be her mom. It was hard, but I accepted this fact, and prayed daily for Sarah and her parents.
Closed adoptions were the norm back then, but I fretted, why couldn’t I be like Hannah in the Bible? Hannah had relinquished her first-born to God just like I did, but at least Hannah got to see Samuel grow up when she went to the temple each year? Whereas I might never see Sarah again, unless we could be reunited when she became an adult.
God was so good to me though, and only a year after giving up Sarah, I met a wonderful man. As time went by, my empty arms were filled three times over with our children. Like Hannah, God had heard my prayers too.
Twenty years after I relinquished Sarah, she and I were reunited, and slowly developed a relationship of Birthmom and Birthdaughter. But the loss of a child, the hunger of an empty womb would touch Sarah as well. Over the years Sarah had a number of miscarriages. Like Hannah…like her adoptive mom…and like me…Sarah wept her prayers to God for a child.
On February 1, 2014, Sarah gave birth to her first-born, and she named him Ian Samuel. The biblical Hannah and her son Samuel portray so much, not only the pain of an infertile womb, being a relinquished adoptee, but also that of a birthmother who has relinquished her child. Sarah is the model on the front cover of my first novel, Shadowed in Silk.
Irish-born Christine Lindsay writes award-winning historical novels. In Shadowed in Silk and Captured by Moonlight, Christine weaves the Heavenly Father’s redemptive love throughout stories of danger, suspense, adventure, and romance. The Pacific coast of Canada, 200 miles north of Seattle, is Christine’s home. Connect with Christine on any of the following: Christine Lindsay’s Blog Drop by her Author Facebook page Follow her on Twitter or Pinterest