She’s Not My Baby Anymore
Less than three weeks ago, our daughter got married. Since her engagement in November, my husband and I have experienced the strange push and pull of helping a fledgling out of the nest.
As in every stage of parenting, we grappled with control. When do you relinquish control and allow the child to fly or to fall? When do you maintain control? And when do you force your child to take control even though they don’t want to?
Weddings magnify this. While we controlled certain aspects, such as the size of the overall budget, we let our daughter make most of the decisions and even insisted she do tasks she didn’t want to. Our greatest joys came from watching her exercise her creativity, discover new strengths, and learn new tasks, all while leaning more on her fiancé and the Lord, and less on us.
In the process, I realized she isn’t my baby anymore. And I’m glad. She’s so much more than that. She’s an adult, a godly and mature young woman.
Isn’t that the goal of parenting anyway? Not to raise children, but to raise adults?
So now my husband and I slip into new roles, and watch our daughter and our newest son fly together.
Sarah Sundin is the author of seven historical novels, including Through Waters Deep (Revell, August 2015), plus a novella in Where Treetops Glisten (WaterBrook, September 2014). Her novel On Distant Shores was a double finalist for the 2014 Golden Scroll Awards. Sarah works on-call as a hospital pharmacist and teaches Sunday school and women’s Bible studies. You can find her at http://www.sarahsundin.com