Six Ways to Become Wise Parents Who Talk to Their Kids About Sex
Raising your kids in today’s world to resist sexual pressure is not easy. Here are six ways to become a wiser, more effective parent in helping your kids experience their sex lives as God designed. We can tell you that these six have worked for us and we have seen how effective they have been for others.
1. Be an “Askable” Parent
As much as this might get our stomachs flipping, being available for any question your child asks is important. If your children are asking you the questions, then you are in a position to guide them. The key here is to be as calm as possible with any questions your kids might ask and be honest and candid with your answers.
2. Be a “Listening” Parent
When we listen attentively to our kids, it tells them they are important and we want to hear what they have to say. You really can’t be a very good “askable” parent without being a good “listening” parent.
3. Be a Parent with Values
Your kids make decisions about their sexual behavior based on their values. And, by and large, they get their first set of values from you. That is why it is so important that you be a parent with strong biblical values.
4. Be a Parent Who Befriends Your Kids’ Friends
At about 5:30 p.m. they all started to show up. I (Dottie) was about seven years old and had taken it upon myself to throw a dinner party. The only problem was that I’d failed to mention all this to my mom. But, instead of getting angry or sending the kids home, she enthusiastically set the table and opened up some boxes of macaroni, cans of peas, and some cans of fruit. It was all she had in the cupboard, but we had a feast and a great celebration! And as always, she made it a point to focus on each child that came. She purposely made each one feel welcome and special. Mom got involved in the lives of my friends, whether it was convenient for her or not, and it made a huge impact on their lives as well as on mine. In fact, my mom became my friends’ hero.
5. Be a Parent Who Networks with Other Parents
Networking with other parents gives you the opportunity to gain from their knowledge. By interacting with other like-minded people who have similar interests, experiences, and goals you can pick up valuable tips on raising your own kids. Some of the greatest practical knowledge and insights come from other parents with children about the same ages or just a little older than yours and even parents who have already raised their children. You can find encouragement, parenting ideas, companions for your own kids, educational tools, sports or entertainment suggestions, as well as advice on discipline, health issues, and sex education.
6. Be a Parent Who Dreams with Your Kids
Parenting and children’s health writer Laura Flynn McCarthy wrote an article in Family Circle and said, “Kids who feel they have a promising future are the most deliberate in preventing pregnancy…Hope is a great contraception.” When we champion our kids and dream their dreams it raises them to a whole new level of hope and they end up wanting to live up to high expectations.
Be an “askable” and “listening” parent, one with values, who befriends your kids’ friends, networks with other parents, and dreams with your kids. As you learn and grow to become more and more of that kind of dad or mom, it will have a direct affect upon your kids’ receptiveness to your teaching about sex.