The Joys of Motherhood
by Laura Booz
The knitting club donates hats for the babies born at our local hospital. The nurses select “just the right” hat for each baby. They had a hard time finding a hat to fit my newborn preemie. It wasn’t because her head was too tiny and the hats were too big. It was because labor and delivery had gone on so long: she had the noggin to show for it. The pediatrician said, “That’s quite a cone head.” And then, as if convincing himself, he added, “It will go down in time.” He recommended that I ever-so-gently press her head back into shape.
Press her head back into shape? Was I hearing him correctly? She was so tiny and helpless. I was so tiny and helpless. If this was what it meant to be a mother, I was not cut out for it. I didn’t know I’d be responsible for the shape of her head! Let alone introducing her to Jesus, teaching her to love people, and how to be courageous, creative, and kind. It was all too much.
I wanted the best for her, but I was flooded by my weaknesses and inadequacies. How would I ever do right by her? I had one hope: God himself would walk with us step by step.
I held her close and curved my palm over her head. I still remember the texture of the pink yarn. I remember her warmth, radiating through the knit hat to me. I prayed for her. I asked God to help her to grow in wisdom and stature and in favor with God and with people. I prayed that she would love Him with all her heart and soul and mind and strength.
Without planning it, this is how I began motherhood: with my hand on my child’s head, blessing her. I pressed my lips to her forehead and whispered, “You are mine. I am your mother and I love you. I am here for you.”
God handpicks each child for each mother and introduces us to one another through a story unlike anything we’ve heard before, with circumstances that compel us to lean on him with our full weight. He knits our hearts together as only he can.
Our calling as mothers may feel too big, too glorious for us to comprehend. But our Creator lays his hand on us and blesses us saying, “You are mine. I am your father and I love you. I am here for you.” Those moments—those holy moments—when we know his ever-present help and care, are the joys of motherhood.
“You hem me in behind and before; You have laid Your hand upon me.” Psalm 139: 5
Oh, and the doctor was right. In time—and certainly not because I pressed it ever-so-gently—my daughter’s head rounded out just fine.
Laura Booz is a writer and teacher who encourages women to love God, think biblically, and live vibrantly. She’ll cheer you on, share practical ideas, and point out the beautiful ways God is working in your life. Laura contributes to her local church and a variety of Christian ministries including Revive Our Hearts, True Girl, enCourage and Covenant Eyes. She and her husband, Ryan, and their six children make their home in Pennsylvania. She is the author of Expect Something Beautiful: Finding God’s Good Gifts in Motherhood. Meet her at LauraBooz.com.