The Ruler of the Roost?
Early in her marriage, Alexi just couldn’t allow herself to be “ruled” by Brent. She kept her finances separate, refused to allow Brent to make even the simplest decisions, and fought against his desires to protect and care for her. And she definitely wouldn’t succumb to the idea that she was his “helper.”
Brent thought leadership meant controlling the situation, so he pushed and demanded that Alexi “submit.” Fortunately, it didn’t take long for them to realize that they needed some counseling to figure out what was going so wrong.
God’s plan for your marriage isn’t for you to play power games, manipulate each other to get your way, or control your mate for selfish purposes. You’re here on this earth to love and serve, so your role as a husband or wife is primarily to love and serve each other.
God made man to naturally be the protector, provider, and covering for his wife and children, as well as the leader and, ultimately, the one responsible for the family. He’s not a paycheck, a bill payer, or a convenient roomie—as I have heard women quip in the movies and in real life.
God made woman to naturally be a completer, a helper, a counterpart, a nurturer, a balancer, and a life giver. She’s not a play-thing, a doormat, or a maid—as I’ve seen men treat their wives in real life, on TV shows, and in the movies.
So love each other, and be willing to serve each other well. It’s that basic.
Susan G Mathis is author of The ReMarriage Adventure: Preparing for a Lifetime of Love & Happiness and Countdown for Couples: Preparing for the Adventure of Marriage with her husband, Dale. Visit www.SusanGMathis.com for more.